Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
Why are you speaking in third person?
Because I'm so hungover that I don't even want to be myself anymore.
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
I just sneaky put a tampon in on the bus ninja-style.
......how on earth do you do that?
NINJAAAA
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
THIS FUCKNUGGET
DOES HE EVEN REALIZE HOW MANY INCREDIBLE INSULTS I'VE WASTED ON HIM
I'VE INSULTED THE EVERLOVING SHIT OUT OF HIM AND HE CAN'T EVEN APPRECIATE IT
THE HO
i was sitting on the kitchen floor shaking my gallon of vodka at people and asking if they wanted to climb the heaven hill... getting dumped is the best thing that has ever happend to me
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
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