just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity
did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
so my daughter wakes me up this morning and i feel like a vibration so im thinking she has my phone..nope my vibrator
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
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