Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
You haven't puked in my sink in over a year.. Youre coming over this weekend
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
Remember when I made fun of you when you ran out of toilet paper on your brother's birthday and had to use coffee filters? Guess what happened today
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
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