Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
I woke up, mistook him for my ex, and started screaming. It was all that chest hair. I don't think this relationship is going anywhere.
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
soo according to the calendar on my phone, I'm 5 minutes late to have sex with that guy from work. Apparently we planned this, I even set an alarm.
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
Woke up this morning buried in a mountain of chex mix and bubble wrap. We must have been doing something great last night
nothin like your phone freezing up and sending out old booty calls at 11am on a sunday. fml.
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
She was pretty impressed that I led all thirty of us back to campus in my state of drunk. Evidently so impressed that she now refers to me as "Moses" in bed.
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
Randomize
