i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
i literally laid in bad for an hour last night thinking of what i'm going to name my cats when i become a cat lady.
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
My flask crushed my baggie full of aderall in my backpack, why can't my demons just live together in peace
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
I'm still mad from all the stupid shit he's done this week that even though I couldn't give two shits about Vday, I'm gonna throw an epic tantrum if he doesn't morph in to Nickolas Sparks for a day
I went to bed early to get up and have a cup of coffee and watch a Sunday sunrise; and again you come home with no shirt and more stamps than my passport. Get the fuck up now, you are taking an Uber to waffle house. The order is in you name.
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
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