she woke up with a sticky ear
she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
Brought a cooler and a case to a parade. I'm getting dirty looks since it's 10:30. Telling people it's for the troops.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
3 guesses about who had to still-drunkenly facilitate a fire drill at 2:40am because freshmen can't handle microwave popcorn.
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
So, looks like I managed to leave my bra in the boardroom after all the sex. FML.
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
Randomize
