I got raped by $2 you call it's. I'm still hammered. And mentoring high school kids. My life is a joke.
So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
after the first blizzard, i went out and bought a thirty and put it in a cooler and hid it out in the backyard. now the second blizzard has deposited 2 feet of snow on top of said cooler. there is a shovel and treasure map over here waiting for you
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
Randomize
