NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
The trash can in my living room is full of Popsicle sticks and my vibrator has taken up permanent residence on my coffee table. I'm not doing anything productive. Clearly.
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
I just opened a beer with a child's toy at a 5 year olds birthday....can you look up the next AA meeting?!!
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
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