What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
You tried to prove you weren't drunk by loudly singing the romanian national anthem. Why the fuck do you even KNOW the romanian national anthem?
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
Can I come over and use your shower? My roommate got drunk last night and took my bathroom door off its hinges
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
I finally realized he drank way too much when he tried serenading me to the song "come my lady" while slowly and creepily making his way toward me...keeping constant eye contact.
She told me I’m a “stunt cock.” I’m okay with that
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