garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
All I want to do right now is burp, puke, and fart. In that order.
im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
I'm pretty sure I just won at life. I touched the bushy tail of a squirrel while he had his mouth full and was digging in a plant on campus. That is all.
Just found a pair of vomit-soaked socks in my purse, three days after the party... Now I know why my wallet was wet.
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
Things change once you put a ring on it. 5 years ago if I had morning wood she would have gone nympho on that. Now I am just lucky if she touches it rolling when we sleep.
Randomize
