so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
Now that I'm single, I like to think of myself as in a relationship with Taco Bell.
Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
still not dressed at 5:00, jacking off watching men's figure skating and hoping my weird roommate doesn't walk in. anybody who says idk how to have fun is wrong
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
at this point, i'm only going to therapy to get more free condoms
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
Randomize