take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
U know its gonna be a great day when the guy at the liquor store waves at u cause u walked by
she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
Come here. I'm drunk. Family Function. Intense Pro-life vs. Pro-choice debate. Bring Republicans.
Just saw 3 10-year olds in business suits drinking iced coffees at the cafe. I'm officially a failure if these kids have jobs and I don't.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
Hey, just wanted to let you know that University Police stopped by and repossessed the stolen laundry basket. And the 8 bottles of detergent.
I think I'm still drunk...I just gave my empty conditioner bottle a break-up speech before I threw it away.
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
Randomize
