But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
Just heard the garage door open and I immediately sprinted to the laptop to erase history, even though I haven't watched porn today...I believe Pavlov now.
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
I just face planted on a condom wrapper in my bed...thought of you.
You're so romantic.
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
Are you coming to the bday night? i'll be doing a life-like reenactment of traveling through Bonnie's vaginal canal and taking my first breath of life. Don't think you'll want to miss it.
I can bring a slip n slide and curtains.
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
Never remove your contact lenses after eating an entire bag of spicy doritos.
This may be the most redneck thing I've ever said, but I know all there is to know about farting dogs
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