whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
my room smells like sperm. sweet.
I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
Left my card at the bar and had a drunk girl climb on the hood of my running car to scream at me.
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
When i'm home next we need to get baked and go to waffle house. I want to see if the waitress can still guess my intoxication level and what i'm about to order before i even make it to the table.
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
The shitshow that was last night is the gift that just keeps on giving
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
Randomize
