Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
Randomize