Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
dude you were so wasted last night you ate a sandwich made out of tomatos, cheese, doritos, salt & pepper. Then you heated it in the micro for 5 min to melt the cheese.
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
Dude I was walking down the street and threw up in a plastic cvs bag. Tequila wins again.
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
Randomize
