i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
I have officially made out with every girl you've made out with, even the random you met on the Mexico flight
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
So I told him it takes a lot to get me drunk & he said he was the heavyweight champion in college. We high-fived. Obviously I'm the favorite child.
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
I'll text you tomorrow when I'm not in someone's torture cave if I don't by noon call for help.
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
Randomize
