problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
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I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
And by "hammer out the details" you know I mean spending 20 minutes on wedding plans then getting wine drunk, right?
So the keyword here is "hammered"?
Alright, who started the "how long till dereck gets deported from Australia" pool? I want in on that.
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
Well I didn't spend $7 on an Uber just to get limp dick
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
