i chose cheese fries over sex for the third time this week.
i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
A lady just asked me if you "seat yourselves" here at qdoba. I told her yea and she has been sitting at a table waiting for someone to take her order for 25 mins.
We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
Emergency! LinkedIn connected me to a hotornot hookup from sophomore year... slutty phase sphere has officially invaded grown up professional sphere. My illusions of interweb sexual anonymity have been exploded.
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
Pretty sure I picked a cat up off the street and took him home with me, fed him tuna, then let him go
My dad handed me a drink and said, "This'll knock your dick in the dirt..."
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
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