oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
1) Woke up alone with my bathing suit on inside out spooning an empty bottle of Jack, 2) get the fuck on to my level 3) please pick me up and bring a stuffed pony, some Oreo's and my pride...
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
my penis made a compromise with my morals
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
Randomize
