Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
Maybe shotgunning 4 days after oral surgery wasn't such a good idea after all...
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
You christened everyone with a powdered doughnut and then tried to absorb vodka with your nipple.
VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
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