He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
I got kicked out of a mexican restaurant last night for being too drunk. This is getting dangerously close to rock bottom
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve.
THIS IS WHY I WENT TO SCHOOL FOR TO BE A COSMETOLOGIST TO HELP MY EX BOYFRIENDS CURRENT GIRLFRIEND BE MILDLY ATTRACTIVE... Everything DOES happen for a reason
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
Randomize
