Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
Oww! U thought rug burn was bad! Fuckin carseat burn hurts like a mother!!!
Wtf?
Use the slutty part of ur brain.
My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
Randomize
