Fuck appropriateness.
he told me my hair look so beautiful and as he was stroking it his fingers got caught in my BUMPIT. How are you supposed to explain that one?
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
Grad practice is like a live scrapbook of my drunken sexual encounters
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
He's probably hung over. I sure as hell am. I want to pop out my eyeballs with a fork and soak them in cold water
Just called a girl a cunt over peanuts. I think we both know it wasn't just about the peanuts.
It was super embarrassing when I had to tell my brother, in front of my mother, that my wifi password was Drinkupbitches. Thanks for providing that lovely family moment.
I have a gay crossdressing neighbor that's dresses up as a slutty pirate. 6 beers from now I would have hit on him. I hate halloween.
I partied with 2 slutty ninja turtles from Sweden last night, I Love Halloween.
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
I am naked and annoyed.
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
Randomize
