I fucked a guy named chris tucker last night
Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
my lips still taste like vagina
so you liked breakfast?
ehh, still wish we woulda went to IHOP instead
He finally admitted that he was drunk when I asked him how he got the rug burn on his chin and he replied "the worm contest"
some girl just asked me how to spell unconscious. I really want to know what she was texting.
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
This inappropriate post strip club text brought to you by Cheetah of Palm Beach and vodka. Blowjob in the champagne room and the clap for the low low price of your paycheck.
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
He says I vaguely mumbled happy New year, kissed him, threw up and then went back to sleep.
i just woke up in my dog's bed, on my parents floor, my outfit on backwards, and a bottle of lube poured down my pocket.
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