please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
The bouncer called to give me my shoes back when I got there he said " I'm all cool with fuvking bitches but when you try to to do it in my bar on the pool table you're gonna get chocked out every time"
At least you got your shooes
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
The only monogamous relationship I can keep is with my eyebrow lady...
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
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