I'm calling you out on twitter if you don't come over right now.
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
I smelled like jager and penis. The only cure was a pack of camels and plan b.
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
I sang him a lovely rendition of 'So Long and Thanks For All the Fish", but replaced fish with dick.
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
Randomize