repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
I have just disproved the common belief that it is impossible to have mediocre sex in a fire truck.
The fire in my vagina flames on. Fucking terrible firefighter
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
Uh, he still talks to you after you basically sexually harassed him using emojis?
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
I really feel like I should slow down on the getting hammered. I told a bartender on "Taco Tuesday" that a $3 margarita was too expensive. And proceeded to have a $70 tab.
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
Randomize
