so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
Dude, I just scraped frozen vomit from my rooftop
I really wish I could say this is a new low for you
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
WHY ARE THE COPS ALWAYS AT DENNYS WHEN IMDRUNK!?
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
The cat's telling me to stop taking acid, and to start doing the lords work. I'm almost 99% sure he's talking about the dark lord.
THIS CAT'S GOING TO TURN INTO A SNAKE AND KILL ME! GET OVER HERE NOW! BRING YOUR WAND.
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