It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
I need like a billion tiny bottles of alcohol to put in the patron pinatas
Randomize
