Reason #82 that I need to get laid: my pubes are getting split ends.
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
You owe me new eyes. The ones I have are burned with your balls into the back of my eyes. And every time I close them, your balls are right there...
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
If I hear that song one more time I will drive to hell and make John Lennon eat my ass.
Randomize
