thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
Eating doritas dunked in queso con salas. Salllas. Salska. Salsa. Got it. Shhiitt. Salsa con queso. That's better. I'm hot pink socks.
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
I used the light from the first guy's text notification to be able to snapchat the second guy in the dark. I am too good at juggling guys.
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
Tolerating him while I'm not drunk is like trying to find a word that rhymes with orange
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
Randomize
