I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
I walked into his room and he was naked with a half eaten pecan pie and a bottle of wine.
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
It'll be a romanticized airport meeting until I'm judged for sitting on his face in the terminal
I put a bagel at the end of my bed so every time I want a bite I have to do a sit up
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
Randomize
