i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
Uh i was pretty wasted sat, so if i was weird it wasnt me. It was just vodka bein weird w my phone
Tonite tequila might call you
Be prepared
I swear to god he was trying to crawl under my door last night muttering "I'm Alex Mac! I'm Alex Mac!"
I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish.
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
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