Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
I wonder if they'd let me siphon the gas out my car before they impound it
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
So I saw the nuva ring just lying on the counter at Planned Parenthood...did u know it's just a ring? I could go to the Dollar tree buy a plastic bracelet and shove it up there instead.
You do that. Then go have lots of unprotected with your harem of booty calls and see how that works out for you.
Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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