help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
I just made what I can safely estimate to be a 900 calorie pb&j. Fuck a serving size.
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
Im going to buy a thermometer. If its above 104 im going to the hospital if its under 104 im going to the bar
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
Randomize
