I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
it was like that last scene in "It's A Wonderful Life" but with alcohol
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
Apparently, my drunken 3AM idea of safety is to send a GPS map of my location to someone 700 miles away. Seriously considering death as a viable alternative to this hangover. Death or Yuengling.
Hey it happens. Think of it this way- you didn't wake up in jail, your face wasn't inexplicably busted and you still have all your teeth. In this group of friends, you're on top!
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
Randomize
