Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
He told me to pretend to be a shark, and he would slay me with his harpoon cock.
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
You kept flirting with some guy while I was throwing up on the sidewalk, and I screamed YOU DON'T LIKE MEN
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
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