I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
She just came home holding a fire hydrant. Yes a fire hydrant.
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
Hey you remember last Super Bowl when I sent you a pic of my testicles? Memories...
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
I'm chatting on my fake OkCupid account and watching Lion Witch & Wardrobe on my second screen. Hail me, King of the Creepers
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
Today's forecast: 90% chance of bad decisions, good stories, solid new dick and artichoke pizza
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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