But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
I just called a phone sex line and you know what I did? I sat there and cried
Flirting with the rich sleazy owner of the club: 1 way ticket to free sushi, drinks, and VIP passes. FUck! im better with older men than i am with babies and dogs
When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
I woke up on the steps beside a plate of spaghetti and a toilet paper roll ripped in half. And i actually think this day is gonna get better.
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
I walked into his room and he was naked with a half eaten pecan pie and a bottle of wine.
I've created a drink called, "watching the sound of music with grandma." its straight vodka
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
obviously my window is still shattered. they're pressure washing my condo today. i think i need a bloody mary.
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
Randomize
