What are you wearing to our high school reunion?
I don't know, What kind of dress says "I feel sorry for you people?"
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
Hi I am too sober and out of rum. Translation: I owe you some beer. Also, get better taste in beer.
FYI you are now my emergency contact at plan parenthood
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
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