i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
How bad is the voicemail?
You graded my boobs.... C minus. Asshole.
She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
He made a group chat with him, his wife, & I. Is this really life!??
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
