Forgive me I'm always horny when I wake up
I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
i just found a bag of weed behind my capital one card. i guess that's what's in my wallet.
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
My mom just called hysterical. She and her sister found my dead grandma's vibrator.
The apple don't fall far from that tree.
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
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