So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
Standing on the street at 6am in Hong Kong drinking beer. Watching all the hookers do the walk of shame from our hotel. How did I get here? Maybe all my bad choices in my life were really good ones?
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
I won't drink with you again until you promise to not feed me anymore paper bags
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
I vaguely remember ordering a water at some point last night. It's good to know drunk me can still be responsible.
You're a wizard. You are a master of disguise. You are beautiful. I love you.
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
Randomize
