im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
I suppose drinking a cosmo at lunch alone can't look good but I mean... sometimes it's just necessary
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
I have a breathe right strip stuck to my forehead, several inexplicable bruises and I think someone tried to paint my nails with glue, but I still have my Santa hat. I'm gonna call this one a success.
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
I don't like kids.
You were literally holding a baby 5 minutes ago
I like them before they learn to speak and after they learn to think.
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