ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
Are you still free tonight?
Oh shit I kinda forgot and took acid
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
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