idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
You know you're drunk when you're apologizing for your asshole at 4am to the toilet. Eat shit habanero bbq sauce, you've ruined my life.
It's one of those "I can't stand you but we're stuck in the same hotel room tonight so let's fuck until one of us passes out" kind of nights.
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
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