My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
Just saw you drinking out of a flask on national tv. I've never been more proud of you
I said:" get your jacket, get your beer and get the fuck out of here"
Firing someone with a rhyme is the new high point in my life.
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
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