party started at 10. cops are coming to shut us down now and its 11. i already lostmy underwear and im wearing a sparkly thong on my haed. this has to be some kinda record.
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
If there's anything else you're planning on stealing from me, please let me know so I can set it on fire
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
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