I can make a handprint turkey for extra credit in history. I feel like the word college should be in quotes on the school letterhead.
last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
I woke up hugging my purse and I found a business card in my underwear. How?
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
In the last 2 hours I managed to have romantic starlit sex on the beach as the tide came in with not only just a gorgeous man, but one who happens to be Eastern European and finishing Harvard law school.
Oh wow. I want to be you right now.
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
Randomize
