I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
I'm going to go ahead and refrain from sexting you in an airport that is currently at a "level orange" security threat.
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