Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
It's gonna be one of those someone is getting divorced parties
I've been laying here all day wondering why my back hurt so bad and then I remembered last night.... When you pushed me through that glass table.
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
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